ToxicRelationships

00:00Intro

[Intro song] Hey, I am Dr. Gian. Life is not a lecture. It's a set of lessons. Pull up a chair. Let's talk about how to live them.

00:31A relationship that looked normal

Most of us have been in a relationship that looked normal until we realized it was not. I think you are the kind of person who wants to believe people are good. You try to give them a chance, right?

00:46Ahab married Jezebel

Don't you? Some people are simply bad. They look for someone like them. Ahab did. He married Jezebel. First Kings chapter 16 verses 30-33 tells us about it. Let me show you what they did and how toxic that bond was. This woman hated God. She did not want what the Bible says and she did not want the Lord's prophets around. She had them killed. That is what evil people do. They use their place, their work, or their money to attack God's people.

01:25Elijah on Mount Carmel

Elijah the prophet confronted Ahab on Mount Carmel. Yes, and this is what he did. He brought 450 prophets of Baal and 400 prophets of Asherah. The test was simple. Whose God will burn the sacrifice? Well, Elijah's God, the Lord God Almighty did it. Elijah won. Jezebel threatened Elijah and he ran. What was going on in the mind of Elijah? Obviously he was afraid, but he ran.

02:03Naboth's vineyard

Jezebel felt superior. Then she had Naboth killed so Ahab could take the vineyard. Evil doers think that they can take it all.

02:15How it ended

Elijah found his courage again and he pronounced judgment on Ahab and Jezebel. Ahab died in battle. Jezebel died a horrible death. Her name later became a symbol for someone who leads people into sexual immorality. You can see the scriptures here on the screen.

02:35Toxic relationships end badly

Toxic relationships always end badly for everyone. Nobody walks away unharmed. Everyone suffers. So what do we do when we are facing people who are toxic or even poisonous?

02:53Five reasons people become toxic

Well, let me show you five reasons why toxic people become that way. Number one, they grew up around control, rage or neglect. Number two, they feel small inside so they put other people down. Number three, fear of losing control power or they have issues with their self-image money or they lose a partner. Four, they never tell the truth about themselves. Everything is someone else's fault. And five, untreated trauma, addiction, envy or bitterness.

03:32What they will not heal, they pass on

Well, what they will not heal, they pass on to everyone close to them. They need help. If you are in a toxic relationship, you need help too.

03:45Hearing God's word

One of the things that will help everybody is to hear God's word. And that is one of our commitments to broadcast 24/7. As you know, we are in four different TV apps and at the same time, Facebook, YouTube, Twitch and Rumble. The idea is to continue motivating people to have faith. Now, you know, some people don't have a favorite show. They have a second home. It's the sofa facing the screen. They don't pay attention to anything. Coming back to the story, Ahab and Jezebel. They came together because they both wanted something wrong.

04:29Sexual sin and toxic relationships

A lot of toxic relationships are driven by sexual sin. Do you know that? But today I am going to show you why that path is dangerous, my friend, and how you can avoid it. Are you ready for this? First of all, you need to stay away from porn, from dirty videos, dirty talks, dirty songs. No. And listen, do not look at all those bad images. Notice the clothing of certain people because they are promoting sensuality and there is filtration. What is the problem? Well, they love secrecy. You know what they like? What is forbidden? It's tricky.

05:15One step is never the last step

One step in that direction is never the last step. It grows. It becomes depravity. And depravity is idolatry. You have seen it. Someone in charge or someone with money who expects everyone to obey. Stay away from that person, my friend. Be aware that demons can work through people who do evil.

05:41Dark places online

There are dark places, you know. Some of those are on the map. Places, geographically, areas. You know that. But there are other dark places online. Why would you walk into those dark areas? On purpose, my friend. That's a mistake.

05:59Build Your World, Build Your Future

Precisely for that reason, I encourage you to learn more and more what the Bible teaches us about our life currently and the future. If you take a look here, there are two wonderful teachings that you should listen to. Build Your World and Build Your Future. Here's the QR code if you want to go ahead.

06:24Two lies

Now listen to these lies. A young person that says, "Well, I have time to mess around. I'll come back later and I will do it right." The other person says the other thing, "I have already lost." What difference does it make if I try to live right now? Those are lies, my friends.

06:49The danger is bigger than a wasted life

The danger is bigger than a wasted life here. It is a soul destroyed in hell and finally the lake of fire. That is why we all need to change course in Jesus' name.

07:06John 3:16

The Gospel of John chapter 3 verse 16 declares that the love of God is so great that He sent His Son, Jesus, to die for your sins and my sins. Our job is to repent and let the Holy Spirit come and dwell inside of our hearts so we can start all over again.

07:27Can fasting help?

Toxic relationships are a big problem for many people. What you need is to get a fresh restart. Somebody asked me one day, "Is it possible that fasting will help me?" And I said, "Absolutely. Fasting will help you." Of course it will help you if you know what

07:48Stop the flesh from running you

it is. Number one is to stop the flesh from running you. Your flesh controls you. When you are fasting, you are saying, "I want more spiritual things than things

08:02Read the Bible

in the flesh." Second, when you are fasting, you must be reading the Bible. During the time that you are reading the Bible, my friend, what you do is that you concentrate on the words that you read. It is not about how much you read the Bible. It is that the Bible will speak to you. When you are sensitive to the voice of the Holy Spirit, you are going to understand way much better what you are reading. And there is when you are going to do the third thing that fasting should

08:35Submit to the Holy Spirit

do in your life. You will learn to submit yourself to the Holy Spirit. And what is that? Well, it is that in any given moment, in any type of situation, you are going to follow that voice, the inner voice of God inside of you telling you, "I don't want you to go there. I don't want you to talk to this person. I don't want you to use your device to go to these places."

09:03Restart in the Spirit

You know, you need to restart in the Spirit so you can help others. Can you imagine? For those that are involved in toxic relationships and they finally realize, you know, this is not going well. I have to finish this relationship and start all over again. You start with God. You become a good believer. You start to fill your heart, your mind with the Word of God. Suddenly, you are out of that toxic relationship. You are healthy. Now you can see better. Now you can help others. It's beautiful when you

09:44Accountability and a healthy marriage

think that through accountability, you can have a healthy life and not just a healthy life. If you are married, you can have a healthy marriage. Imagine that. Difficult to think for so many people. They say, "Oh no, it is impossible to have a healthy marriage." You know, because there are so many fights, arguments inside of a marriage. Well, through accountability, you are going to learn also to have self-control. Meaning what? No more explosions of anger. You are going to be more tolerant. You are going to work with your spouse. And remember, this is very important.

10:31Manage your devices

You manage your devices. Most of the problems that people have with porn begin when they allow the device to control them. Instead of being you, the one controlling the device. Whether it is your phone, your TV, or your computer, you are going to say, "No." And why is that?

10:56Learn to fear God

Because you have to learn to fear God. When you learn to fear the Lord God, you just know it. You just say, "You know, I don't want to continue doing this thing." You are out now of a toxic relationship. You don't want to continue having these problems with people. You want to be totally healed. Because of the fear of God, you say, "I don't want to do this type of things."

11:26More to read

I want to encourage you, if you want to support our ministry, here is the URL. And finally, if you would like to read, try this. Take a look of this PDF. It's easy to download. You are going to enjoy it. Until the next time, see ya!

11:45A little humor

Some people don't just bring drama. They bring an other. There is a couple that are in a toxic relationship. But you know what? They won't quit the toxic relationship because they are loyal to the wreck. Not good. A crazy therapist doesn't treat toxicity. He distributes it. In that case, if the shrink is more toxic than the patient, that's no therapy. That's a group project.

Transcribed from the video and lightly corrected. Spoken words are kept as Dr. Gian said them.